Tuesday, March 25, 2014

Chapter 4: The Daughter of God

The first thing Imogen saw when she opened the door to her dorm room was her roommate's back. She breathed a sigh of relief at the sight of normal long brown hair and a normal pink jacket.

“Hello.” Imogen said.

Imogen was a lot less relieved when her roommate turned around to reveal a pregnant, scantily clad woman with a huge smile and a big cross around her neck.

“Hello! You must be my new roommate. Robb and Bert told me you were an albino.” The woman said a little louder than necessary.

Imogen swallowed a groan and forced a smile. “Yes, I'm Imogen Jones.” She extended her hand.

Her roommate grabbed her hand, and shook it enthusiastically. “Hi Imogen, I'm Jesusette Christ.”

“Jesusette?” Imogen couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at the strange name.

“Yes, I was named after my brother, the all time do-gooder, Jesus.” Jesusette said.

“Your brother is named Jesus Christ? Like the Son of God?” Imogen asked.

Jesusette stepped back and looked carefully at Imogen. “What do you mean, like the Son of God? My brother is the Son of God.”

Oh, wonderful, a nutter, Imogen thought to herself. “So, that makes you the Daughter of God?” Imogen asked, trying hard to sound serious.

Naturally.” Jesusette answered.

“And you're pregnant with God's grandchild?”

Jesusette sighed, “Yes, and you would think daddy would be happy about some new blood after a couple of thousand years, but no, he said it was scandalous. And Jesus, the all time merciful, completely agreed with daddy. I hate them both.She huffed.

Um, so, what are you doing here?” Imogen asked. She decided to play along.

“Daddy is very good friends with Giacomo, the rare lifeforms professor, and he told dad that coming to The University would help me become a responsible adult.”

“I was forced by my parents to come here, too.” Imogen said.

Imogen's roommate might have been completely bonkers but at least they had one thing in common: Horribly overbearing parents.

Thursday, March 20, 2014

Chapter 3: The Arrival

Imogen became quite excited when she saw the castle-like exterior of The University, but all of that faded once she was told by a stuttering, orange haired man wearing a name tag that read “Donny the janitor”, that she had to climb a cliff in order to get to her dorm.

Meeting Donny

Climbing a steep cliff with her luggage strapped to her back was no easy feat for someone as out of shape as Imogen, but after what seemed like hours (and probably was) she reached the top.

The Cliff

All her hard work nearly went to waste when she almost fell backwards over the ridge after seeing two large cat-human hybrids waving enthusiastically at her from the entrance to a mansion, which she assumed must be the dorm.

Imogen cursed her parents, and with a fake smile pasted on her face approached the two creatures.

“Hello and welcome to our home!” The larger of the two said. “Of course, this is also going to be your home for the duration of your stay at The University.”

“Um, thank you.” Imogen said tentatively.

The Brothers

“You must be our resident albino. We were very excited to hear that one would be living with us this year.” The smaller of the two said.

Imogen groaned quietly; being an albino wasn't something she cherished. However, she had not been raised to be rude so—against her better judgment—she extended her hand, “I'm Imogen.”

“Oh yes, of course, introductions, we always forget that part.” The smaller one said again, ignoring Imogen's hand. “I'm Bert, and this is my brother, Robb. We are the dorm owners.”

“And you must be very tired after your climb.” The larger one, Robb, said. “We'll direct you to your room. I believe your roommate is already here.”

“Roommate?” Imogen was horrified. She, a 30 year old woman, was far too old for a roommate.

“Of course! We don't want our students to ever feel lonely.” Bert said, handing Imogen a key. “You're in room 307. Just go up the stairs to the third floor and turn right.”

“Okay, thank you, I guess.” Imogen said before heading to her room.

Thursday, March 6, 2014

Chapter 2: Open For Business

It was time for the first meeting of the year for the faculty and staff of The University.

The conference room

“We're officially ready for a new year.” Mr. Kavendish, the founder of The University, said. “How many new students this year, Sarah?”

Sarah, the dean of Everyone, Everything, and Everywhere, checked her clipboard. “We have ten new students joining us.”

“I knew our website was going to be useful. That's double the number of new students we had last year.” Dr. Antoine, the head of the Science and Technology department, said.


“Oh, that is wonderful.” Mrs. Kavendish said, straightening down her dress. “I just hope the newcomers don't leave without a word like half of the new ones did last year.”

“Robb and I studied psychology over the summer, Mrs. Kavendish, so we'll be taking care of the students in our care.” Bert, one of the dorm owners, said.

“Oh, that is wonderful.” Mrs. Kavendish said running her hand through her hair.

“Uh, sorry, but what about the...eh...residents in the sewer system.” Donny, the janitor, asked.

“Sarah and I decided to include them in my survival course; not getting mauled by them will be a requirement for passing the class. That should be an incentive for the students to be more careful.” Roberta, the head of the Survival and Self Defense department, said.  

Big, scary monster

“Good idea, Roberta. Now, where are Leonid and Giacomo, Sarah?” Mr. Kavendish asked.

“Leonid is out buying supplies for his “Rare Lifeforms” Course.” Sarah said. “As usual, he's late, and Giacomo is at the Ponder Truth Institute for a conference, but he should be back in time for the first day of his “The True Truth” Course.”

Leonid and Giacomo are away

“Oh, that is wonderful.” Mrs. Kavendish said, adjusting her glasses.

“First thing tomorrow morning we open the doors of The University to the students.” Mr. Kavendish said. “So I suggest everyone get a good night sleep tonight since I'm sure we have another busy semester ahead. With our 10 new arrivals, we're going to have 56 students, and we need to be well-rested and alert to handle them.”

“I agree. So everyone, meeting adjourned. See you all tomorrow morning at the opening ceremony.” Sarah said before they all left the room for one last night of peace and quiet.

Thursday, February 27, 2014

Chapter 1: The Journey Begins

“I can't believe I let him talk me into this.” Imogen mumbled as she put her only luggage into the trunk of her father's car, and with one last look at her small house got into the passenger seat. She had barely fastened her seatbelt when the car sped off; clearly, her father didn't want to risk her changing her mind.

“You are going to love it there, pet.” Wallace Jones said. “I've heard absolutely wonderful things about this school.”

“Dad, you've only talked to one person.” Imogen rubbed her temples; she could feel a migraine coming. “Come to think of it, only one person has heard of "The University". The place doesn't even have a real name, and their website only has one page.”

“Well, love, Marlon says it's a very old-fashioned school. You know, they don't really do internet and all those fancy stuff, and calling the school "The University" is pithy.” Wallace said to his daughter.

“I don't even know why I need to go back to university. Why did I agree to this? This is a horrible idea; I need to be close to my son.”

“Imogen, love, you're doing this for your son.” Wallace said. “You could learn a new trade at university, and stand on your own two feet. Remember, the judge said you need to become independent if you want to get custody of Jamie back.”

Imogen sighed, She knew she had to do something drastic to get her child back from that bastard ex of hers, and going back to school was as good a drastic action as any. “You're right, dad.” Imogen finally said, “But I just don't understand why I can't sign up for a local college or something.”

Wallace turned his head slightly to look at his daughter and smiled apologetically. “Well, pet, let's be honest, you don't really have many options when it comes to choosing a place to study.

“We're almost at the train station. I'll drop you off at the curb, okay? I need to go pick up the dry-cleaning before they close or your mother will go off her rocker.”

“Yeah, dad, it's okay.” Imogen said.

Imogen put her bag on the seat next to her, and sat down. She pulled her knees up to her chest which made her look pitifully forlorn. She had dropped out of school once before—because of her newborn son—but her mother and father were certain she would be able to finish this time.

Her parents were desperate for her to go to this nameless university, which made Imogen certain that they knew something they'd decided not to share with her. She sighed and put her head on her knees, deciding a nap would be the best way to pass the time.